Did you see this?
Careerbuilder put out a list of the most outrageous excuses for being late to work.
Here’s the list:
I got mugged and was tied to the steering wheel of my car.
(And my car’s a Prius)
My deodorant was frozen to the window sill.
(I didn’t know taxi drivers used deodorant)
My car door fell off.
(It’s a 1 AD Yugo)
It was too windy.
(And that was just from all my hot air)
I dreamt I was already at work.
(Then I dreamt I was fired)
I had to go to the hospital because I drank antifreeze.
(And now the damn car won’t work because I put coffee in it)
I had an early morning gig as a clown.
(I know…what bozo would come up with that excuse?)
A roach crawled in my ear.
(Now I’m starting a business as a roach motel)
I saw an elderly lady at a bus stop and decided to pick her up.
(She was great in bed)
My dog swallowed my cell phone.
(But now the reception’s much better)
*****
Willblogforlols is written for entertainment purposes only. This post was intended to be funnier, but the dog ate my humor.
Andrew Wisot is a freelance writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and an US Weekly Fashion Cop who’s “between jobs.” Andrew will blog for LOLs until he’s employed again or 50,000 miles, whichever one comes first.
Email: andrew@willblogforlols.com
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